How to Practice Self-Compassion

Three key steps to turning compassion inward

Lincoln Hill, PhD
2 min readApr 30, 2021
Photo by Jeffery Erhunse on Unsplash

As the great Tina Turner once famously said, “We never ever do nothing nice and easy.” These days so much of the collective focus is on hustling and grinding — attempts at trying to do and be more; however nebulous or out of reach this might seem on any given day. With so many distractions outside of ourselves and external pressures, there are ample opportunities to miss the mark and not live up to our predetermined expectations. Missed your sales quota? Self-blame. Mind went blank during your exam? Self-attack.

In these moments, shame and disappointment can feel like daunting challenges that hinder our ability to turn our focus inward. We may want to completely suppress these experiences, or we may find ourselves completely submerged in them and speaking to ourselves in overly critical tones that only make us feel worse about ourselves.

While self-compassion might be the very last thing you’ve considered while actively falling down a shame spiral, it might just be a tool that helps ensure that you and your feelings always have a safe and soft space to land.

Leading researcher and self-compassion expert Dr. Kristin Neff describes self-compassion as the culmination of three parts: self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness…

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Lincoln Hill, PhD
Lincoln Hill, PhD

Written by Lincoln Hill, PhD

Black woman, mental health counselor, researcher, wellness consultant, PhD in counseling psychology, and Beyoncé stan. IG: black_and_woman_IG

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